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Young Catholics accept the church as is
'There are things about the Catholic church that are out of my control'
Aug. 14, 2009
The latest installment: In Search of the Emerging Church
Young people are arguably the most studied, analyzed and coveted group in the Catholic Church.
If churches conducted auctions for members, the bids for them would shoot through the roof. Everyone wants them. They are the future. At the same time, everyone wonders where they are and how to keep them if they dare to darken the door of the local church.
In interviews earlier this year with young Catholics (most were in their 20s and 30s, two were in their mid-40s) at Our Lady of Czestochowa Parish in Jersey City, N.J., it seemed clear that some ideas about church membership are definitely age- or generation-specific. Younger Catholics appear reluctant to use such labels as conservative or liberal in describing themselves or others, while traditional pieties and the church's tradition itself can play an important role in someone's decision to become Catholic.
Those around the table, all of whom had chosen to become active in a particular Catholic community, said they spent little time worrying about hierarchical matters or many of the hot-button issues that might concern those of an older generation. In general terms, they had opted for Catholicism for a host of reasons and, while not ignoring the problems or controversies, did not allow them to get in the way of their participation in church life.
Whatever their inclinations or path to Catholicism, they present little upon which the church can base presumptions today. "I think the church has to earn parishioners to come," said Bridget d'Souza, one of the young professionals who joined the conversation in May at Our Lady of Czestochowa parish in Jersey City, N.J.
She was describing a kind of free-market approach to parish selection that applies to groups across generational lines, but particularly to young people without permanent ties to a neighborhood or diocese. No longer can pastors be guaranteed a congregation because of geography. People go where they're both getting fed spiritually, said d'Souza, and where they can feel ownership of the parish and its activities.
It wasn't that way growing up in a place, she said, where people owned their homes for decades and where churchgoing was determined by parish boundaries.
The loss of those physical boundaries seems symbolic of deeper lines and categories that have become less distinct when it comes to deciding on the bigger questions: whether to be religious at all and, specifically, whether to be Catholic.
While the stories of the eight or so people gathered around the table at Our Lady of Czestochowa hardly constitute a scientific sampling of opinion, it is reasonable to suggest that neither are they an aberrant sample. If they are at all indicative of what is occurring among twenty- and thirty-somethings, church leaders might take heart for the institution's future.
Cradle Catholics are finding reason to either continue on in the faith or rediscover it and those of other faiths (in this group a former Presbyterian and former Lutheran) have found reason to join up despite all the scandals and the sometimes contentious debates within the church.
The group at Our Lady of Czestochowa in many ways were reflective of some of the findings in recent studies. In American Catholics Today: New Realities of Their Faith and Their Church, the results of a study conducted by four prominent Catholic sociologists, young adult Catholics are described as different from previous generations in their attitude toward both civil and religious authorities. "They have been taught to think for themselves" and "to take responsibility for their own relationship with God."
While a "sizeable minority" of young Catholics, estimated at about 20 percent, are deeply religious, attending Mass and confession regularly and thinking of themselves as "orthodox," most are less rigid in their observance. "As long as they believe in God, Jesus' Incarnation and Resurrection, and Mary as the Mother of God and as long as they do whatever they can to love their neighbor, they do not feel obliged to attend Mass every week, go to Confession every year or even marry in the church," according to American Catholics.
Of course, the neat lines of sociological surveys often become less precise in real life.
Ryan SmithRyan Smith is a 25-year-old who grew up in a Presbyterian home in Erie, Pa., but came to Seton Hall University to do a master's degree and converted to Catholicism while a student there. Ironically, in an era that many Catholics might describe as contentious within the church, one of the things that attracted Smith to Catholicism was that dissent could exist without separation. "One of the things about the Protestant faith that really didn't draw me in was the bickering," he said. In Catholicism, he said, "It's not, 'We're going to break off and go here or do that.' There is a strong core that everybody kind of held onto."
"And then there was Catholic social teaching. My specialization in grad school was poverty and economic development and things like that. Catholic social teaching played a huge role in me really coming in."
The week after the interview, Smith said, he would be headed to Alexandria, Va., to begin working for Catholic Charities USA.
D'Souza and her husband, Devantin, have been members of Our Lady of Czestochowa for three years. Both are cradle Catholics. She grew up in New Jersey, and spent time in the Jesuit Volunteer Corps right out of college. He is from Bombay, India, arrived in the U.S. in 2001 and moved to New Jersey in 2005, they year they were married. They met in business school in Washington and at the time of the interview were working as consultants for the financial firm Deloitte and Touche in New York.
In college, she said, she struggled through a period when she asked herself, "Do I want to be Catholic? Do I want to go into a Protestant denomination?" She said she had felt frustration over issues like the sex abuse and financial crises "that you're not as empowered as you might be in other areas, like with your civic government for instance."
In the end, however, it was the tug of "a tradition that goes back 2,000 years" that "draws me in."
Carol Vanhouten (foreground)She perceives a certain power in the tradition, in the Mass and the Eucharist. "There is something there that his so powerful, and I think the church has nurtured that. I think for me the church embodies that." In the larger culture she mentioned, Catholic Charities and all the things that the church does. I don' think most people are aware o that. If they were aware of it, all of these other things that are perceived as negative, they wouldn't be as proportionally as negative in my opinion."
Twenty-three year old James Porter had just completed a master's degree at Seton Hall University in diplomacy and international relations. His contact with Jesuits at Loyola College in Maryland influenced his involvement in the church. Regarding divisive issues within the church, he sad "There are things about the Catholic church that are out of my control. I can't do anything about it and it doesn't affect my faith and my belief in God. At the end of the day, it doesn't affect whether I'm going to go to church or not."
But there is a sense, said Carol Vanhouten, a convert from Lutheranism and a reference librarian for a college in Manhattan, in which we all do something about it when "we don't abandon" the church because of scandals or other disagreements. "We've decided that we want to try to make it better, hopefully by staying. The good people who stay are the ones who strengthen the piece as a whole. I think we do sort of contribute in that way."
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Tom Roberts, NCR editor at large, is traveling the country reporting on parish life. He is on the first of several trips he plans to take, this time moving through Ohio, eastward into New Jersey and on to the nation’s capital. His e-mail address is troberts@ncronline.org. Read the full series here: In Search of the Emerging Church.
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What kept me in the Catholic
What kept me in the Catholic Church since I was 24 was its infallibility. Come hell or high water, infallibility remains. Infallibility remained when Judas Iscariot hanged himself. Infallibility remained after Jesus Christ was crucified. Infallibility remains after members of the Catholic Church fall by the wayside.
You mean you interviewed
You mean you interviewed young Catholics in Jersey City without including a single Hispanic, immigrant or person of color? Or anyone who is not middle class or above in their socio-economic position? Do you think you can understand young Catholics in the U.S. without talking to people who DIDN'T (or can't) go to college? You're a bright man, Mr. Fox, but once again you don't get it.
To be clear: Reporting this
To be clear:
Reporting this story is Tom Roberts, NCR editor at large, not "Mr. Fox."
"Young Catholics accept the
"Young Catholics accept the church as is" - The article is not a ringing endorsement for the "as is". It seems that these few interviewed have little time or concern for the affairs of the hierarchy nor are they sticklers for the detailed orthodoxy, the "Catholic identity" which the papacy, hierarchy and conservative traditionalists define narrowly and focus on as a priority.
These are good men and women, they seem to have identified primarily with the basic mission of Jesus and the institution as a vehicle towards it along with a constant reminder of the "Who". What will happen when they experience the challenge to strict orthodoxy?
Even though the interviewees have all "...chosen to become active in a particular Catholic community..", I wonder whether they would qualify as "practicing"? Granted the author acknowledges that the sampling was not scientific but I would suggest that a future article might include a tinge of scientific sampling of youth who were brought up as Catholic, and who completed their high school within a catholic environment.
My point is that if these young people are the future of the church, does the church recognize them as such or simply tolerate them. Additionally, are thy much different from the seemingly majority of fine young men and womenn who have either walked away from, denied, or simply consider their catholicity irrelevant?
I hope that you will visit a
I hope that you will visit a parish in the emerging Tradionalist movement, for instance the Oratory of the Institute of Christ the King in St. Louis.
I am trying to recapture the
I am trying to recapture the Catholic spirit. I got lost spiritually after a divorce and I was told I was in a terrible sin after the divorce by a monsignor. I would like to sign up for regular updates and be a member of NCR. I am 50 now. When I was a teen, my church was very active in helping the teens and now it seems the Catholic church doesn't do much. It may be the parish I presently attend.
Being divorced is not a sin.
Being divorced is not a sin. Getting remarried without an annulment may be a problem, but if you have not done that, that Monsignor was just wrong. Avoid him, as he is an idiot.
Michael - This person shared
Michael - This person shared general personal information. You make a big leap. She did not say that Monsignor told her that being divorced was a sin. Read more carefully. There is not enough information to know whether the Monsignor was wrong or not and, as such, your statement is neither legitimate nor helpful and that, Michael, makes you as wrong as believe the Monsignor was.
The Church is of course, all
The Church is of course, all about helping the community of the world and acting as one universal family, but it is also about worshiping God. Don't get so focused on what those around us in the pews or even our priests do, since we are all sinners. Our sins are different, but they are just as deadly. Bickering and discontent causes devilish distractions, or rather, worrying about the details and forgetting the real purpose of being a Catholic in the first place, which is to love God and others. We are also to come together to worship God first and foremost with our whole being one on one, and to change the Church for the better by changing ourselves for the better one person at a time. This happens when we let God work in our hearts through the Holy Spirit. We get this strength and peace in the most powerful and lasting way through the sacraments, and through frequent attendance at Mass. St. Philip Neri encouraged his flock to do just this, since this is the way to heaven; don't worry about others or the state of the Church, but just be good yourself and the Church will change, and it did, for the better.
It may be a matter of
It may be a matter of semantics, but calling Lutherans and other mainline Protestants who convert to Rome,members of "other faiths" is inaccurate. We are all Christians whose baptisms are recognized by the Vatican, and it is baptism which makes RC and mainline Protestants similar in that respect. I think you should have said "other denominations". A Mormon or a Jew converting is from "another faith".
Actually, 'converts' is a
Actually, 'converts' is a name NEVER given to a baptized person coming into full communion with RC church from another denomination. They are candidates to be received into full communion. Converts is a term for the unbaptized. See the RCIA manual
When I was a young adult I
When I was a young adult I accepted the Church without question too.
I did too. Until I realized
I did too. Until I realized that God gave me a brain to think about the conditions of mankind, including those whom have been the victims of the Church over history - The Jews, the Blacks to some extent, and today the gay people.
I and almost all of my extended family 44 people have left the church, and dried our tears.
And moved to the Episcopal church. Where grace is the goal, not guilt is for control.
As have many of my friends.
To copy the words of a Great Man, murdered for standing up against the crime of crimes - slavery and segregation justified by the bible, and in which the Catholic church seems to have "gone with the flow" of the local "culture???"...
"Free at last, free at last, thank God almighty we are Free at Last"
A message I have delivered to the church's current despised group - our gay friends with whom we share our humanity, just as we all are. Part of God's Infinite Creation.
For those who find it
For those who find it difficult to stay active in traditional Roman Catholic parishes run by tyrannical dictator pastors, I encourage you to consider the prospect of an “Intentional Eucharistic Community (IEC).” IEC are Catholic parishes formed and governed on a consensus basis by the laity. The laity holds the checkbook, hires priests to serve as presiders at Sunday Masses, runs their own religious education programs, and makes decisions on a consensus basis (consensus among the entire community including the presiders). This is not a new phenomenon; I know of several IEC’s that have recently celebrated their community’s 40th anniversary. An Internet search may lead you to an IEC within driving distance of your home. If not, IEC members may be able to offer you advice on how to start an IEC of your own. There are ways to continue being Catholic that you may not have previously considered . . . .
Catholic without having to be
Catholic without having to be Catholic!?!?! Doesn't sound very Catholic to me. Next.
It does seem Catholic to me.
It does seem Catholic to me. There are thousands of Catholics no longer members of the institutional Church of Rome, and I see no sign of such departures diminishing. The Catholic Church is much more than the autocratic, traditionalist church in which the rest of us Catholics were raised.
Thank you to the comments
Thank you to the comments shared by the young ones of the church. In this Year for Priests, we as Catholics can also pray that many young people will be open to God's call to the priesthood and religious life. We need good and holy priests. I am a mother of three young ones and I am realising how different they are in their approach to their faith. I cannot impose my ways on them and even if I find them difficult to understand, I pray that God will give me the trust that He will give them the grace to be faithful to Him. There are very very few role models for young people in the present world but if encouraged to read the lives of saints, they will find testimonies that would help them. THe Catholic Church has always stood tall in spite of all the scandal etc because Jesus Himself has guaranteed its protection. To me as a Catholic the Sacraments, especially Holy Eucharist and Reconciliation is what sustains me and helps me in my faith journey. Without the Eucharist, where would I be? Without this spiritual nourishment of the very Body and Blood of Christ, how could I become like Him? I pray earnestly for young people to come to love Him in the Eucharist, receiving Him with love and reverence and a hunger that only He can satisfy.
God bless
Yours in Christ
Marianne
In this Year for Priests, we
In this Year for Priests, we as Catholics can also pray that many young people will be open to God's call to the priesthood
How about "old" (and wise) people?
Might be of more help, no?
After reading Mr. Fox's
After reading Mr. Fox's article, I see the views of eight or nine young adults. Not a scientific survey, as Mr. Fox said, nor even a fair sampling, as indicated by the lack of middle-class, people-of-color comment. So what I see is the opinions of a few. Hardly, "the" emerging church; more like a sprout.
However, let me add this: at 59, I'm finding more and more depth in spirituality in the Catholic Church. Granted, some of it is from traditonal sources, such as St. Benedict, St. Francis of Assisi. Some of it from those who have stuck it out, such as the fine book Why Go to Church? by Timothy Radcliff, OP. And some of it by simply spending more time in prayer.
The "emerging" church is sprouting up, is permeating the environment, and is reshaping the ecology of life. Most of us now won't be here to see it in bloom; and perhaps it will never fully blossom as we can imagine. However, make no mistake there are forces mitigating those sprouts, mitigating that ecology, and always darkening the hope. We can trust in Jesus' passion that that is in store for us too. So set your sights directly in front of you with the person or task before you and continue to winnow through the soil above you. On your way, take a piece of bread and sip of wine for nourishment.
To be clear: Reporting this
To be clear:
Reporting this story is Tom Roberts, NCR editor at large, not "Mr. Fox."
As you note, this report,
As you note, this report, based on interviewing a handful of young adults in one parish on the east coast, may, or may not, be representative of younger adult Catholics. Perhaps representative of those who still go to church. But, now representative of their generation of Catholics - many (most?) of whom are inactive at best, totally hostile to the church at worst.
As the parent of three in this generation, all of whom were educated in Catholic schools, I wonder just how representative these eight or nine are of their generation. Mine range in age from 25 - 31. They do not go to church. Nor do the vast majority of their friends, all of whom were raised Catholic and educated in Catholic schools. Those who do, do so to please parents, especially when the first grandchild arrives. My children were educated in a very "conservative" school in one of the most "conservative" dioceses in the country. Complete with sisters in habits. And no female altar servers.
They are all horrified with the hypocrisy of the church. As one son says, "The bishops protected priests who were raping kids. And the pope doesn't care. They're all still bishops. You would think that he would have demanded mass resignations. But he doesn't care." They are also horrified at the way women are treated in the church. This is a generation raised as equals, at least in most communities. They cannot believe that women are still treated as almost a servant class by the church. No priests are women, women cannot give homilies, women cannot be deacons, women have almost no role in the governance of the church - in parishes, in chanceries, and in Rome. The young women are leaving in droves. And when they marry, and they have children, how many will raise their kids in the Catholic church do you think?
These nine do not mention church teaching. They are, like many, drawn by the community and by the social justice ministries. The Catholic church is one of the leaders in developing social justice teachings from a religious and moral stand-point, and many are drawn by that. How sad that for the church, these teachings too often seem to be meant for those outside the church - not for themselves.
My adult children left the church. And, now, so have I.
Here, here! My story is an
Here, here! My story is an echo of yours except my three are 31-37. They are appalled at the dichotomy between church teachings and church practices. Would that the HRCC (Holy Roman Catholic Church)would tow the mark following it's own finger wagging at the rest of the world. It saddens me to realize that the Church does not practice what it preaches so much of the time.
I hurt as well because my
I hurt as well because my daughter has chosen to stay out of the church despite her conversations about God and the simplicity of the gospel. I think Jesus' message was simple and he had to go one-on-one to get it as straight as possible, though it didn't take long for that to break down either.
Yet, I still attend church, though I wonder why at times. As for my daughter, she's now living with a disease that will last her life because of a sexual relationship she justified as 'love at the time.' Despite the simplicity of the gospel, the ability to incorporate it into one's life is difficult for the single person outside of a community, as well as inside that community. We must guard against destroying the church because of its officials.
The church is forever emerging, or ought to be, as we keep praying, keep reflecting, and keep accepting the infinite wonder, breadth and depth of God's love. The young adults in the article reflect a version. Those who "hang" onto narrow interpretations and fundamentalist life jackets reflect another. Jesus' way is diverse yet single-hearted; it is a way for all of us in our own station in life, i.e. tax collector, adultress, fisher, rich man, parent of children. Yes, there are sinners to be reconciled and mended. And the way is frought with the struggles of one unjustly condemned.
Is it any wonder that the
Is it any wonder that the more conservative congregations receive more applicants than the more progressive ones?
Even adults are seeking "refuge" in both male and female communities in order to survive in these economically disastrous times. They are usually turned away because they are less malleable or easily manipulated.
The younger ones are kept, especially if they are "appealing" and often preyed on, still.
The world is made up of predators and their preys. They feed on each other. Why do you think there are so many religious cults or sects? And that the Catholic church has become the largest one among them?
RDS in Virginia wrote: "IEC
RDS in Virginia wrote: "IEC (Intentional Eucharistic Community) are Catholic parishes formed and governed on a consensus basis by the laity. The laity holds the checkbook, hires priests to serve as presiders at Sunday Masses, runs their own religious education programs, and makes decisions on a consensus basis (consensus among the entire community including the presiders)..."
Why is it that so many dissenters think that they can behave and teach and believe however they want and still retain the identity of "Catholic"? What RDS describes here is NOT Catholic. Just because you like to call yourself "Catholic" does not make you one. You cannot be a Catholic and reject the teaching authority of the Magisterium. It's just that simple. Don't like all the icky rules? Don't like the fact that the Catechism isn't a roll-your-own guidebook for those who are "spiritual but not religious"? Don't like the fact that Dogma MUST be believed by faithful Catholics? Then go be a Protestant or a Unitarian or a New Ager, or go call yourself a "modernist catholic-like ecumenical community". But, regardless of what you want to call yourself, you're not "Catholic."
"...you're NOT
"...you're NOT 'Catholic.'"
Oh, yes, we are :)
Um, the Intentional Eucharist
Um, the Intentional Eucharist Community is not Catholic.
You can find any group of people who choose to imitate the U.S. Congress or even call themselves "The U.S. Congress," but that doesn't make them the U.S. Congress in actual reality. Only impostors---in this case, protestants.
Dictator pastors? What?
When I was about seven years
When I was about seven years old, as a Catholic school-boy, I remember I used to inevitably ask my parents of friends and neighbors, "Are they Catholic?"
They'd patiently explain, "no" in most cases but made it clear that they weren't necessarily what the Devil dragged in, either.
I kept asking that same question until I was about 14 years of age, when in the religion class of Sr. Anne Russell OP (Adrian) one of the people I really loved said "I don't want to be Catholic any more." And our dear Sr. Anne said "OK, I can accept that." In between hard-core Bibilical studies of the legend of Gilgamesh.
In that moment, I "grew up."
So, we got over "You're not Catholic nyah nyah nyah nyah nyah" at about age 14.
Care to join us?
I mean, I know we're not *AS* Catholic as you are but maybe you aren't quite as "Catholic" (in the proper definition of the word look it up) as we are, either.
"Dictator pastors?
"Dictator pastors? What?"
Dictator pastors inspired by the autocratic views and practices of JPII.
As the late sociologist of religion Dean Hoge and colleagues noted more than a year ago, the JPII clergy (and bishops) continue to move in one direction while the laity, young and old alike, move in the opposite one.
Maybe we need to promote the death of the Church of Rome in order to promote the birth of a new Catholic Communion of local churches whose bishops do not behave like lackeys of their Roman colleague and his curial retinue.
God knows, his Son is counting on us progressives to put the church back on the path of renewal called for by Vatican II. Some of us work within the institutional church, others outside it. All of us are committed to renewal. It is out of death that new life springs forth!
Good Lord, "most" are less
Good Lord, "most" are less 'rigid'? Whatever can 'rigid' mean today? My dears, unless you want to end up indistinguishable from Unitarians flee to the traditional Mass and throw water on Ms. Chittiser as you rush from Oz and don't back! :-)
The ages of the respondents
The ages of the respondents here would be interesting to note...
Nonetheless, it seems that most of the folks reading and commenting here have the Second Vatican Council (and their interpretation of its documents) as the seminal religious event of their lives. The photos of the staff of the paper, with one exception, show people apparently over the age of 45, with many/most much older. It seems to me that the divide in the Church is much more related to generational differences than to actual theology/ecclesiology, as the article states. Catholics from my parents' generation (they were born in 1950) seem to have imbibed a lot of the "we'll save the world and the Church" hullabaloo of the 1960s. All that was well and good, but the facts pretty well bear out that not much of it worked, and that the new generation isn't much interested in protest puppets, women's ordination, or what the LCWR is doing marching about in NO praying for the wetlands (good Lord, did I actually READ that? My first inclination is to shout, "Get to work!"). Vatican II is for many in my age group just another council, and then, akin to some of the less glorious convocations in the Church's history...kind of another Lateran V or some such. I've come to realize that most people critical of the Church, here and elsewhere, and who regularly spout off about Vatican II, haven't really read the documents of the Council (particularly that somewhat nebulous pieces they produced on the liturgy and the Church), and rely on interpretations provided by people who often have an agenda far to the left of center on lots of different issues. I laughed when I read recently that a woman religious (a Franciscan, as I recall), when asked if she wanted to be a priest, said she didn't even though she knew she'd "be a better pastor than most priests she knows." That one comment is indicative of the entire group of activists gathered under the artifical umbrella we could call the "progressive Catholic movement for reformulation of the Church." Proud. Thank God, however, that most of these folks are spiritual geldings...more and more angry and desperate, but still standing with one foot in the compost heap of ecclesiastical history and the other on a banana peel.
Oh I missed something that
Oh I missed something that absolutely re-inforces the decisions of our family and so many of our friends - to leave......
The Pope is supposed to be infallible. So explain to all of us why he un-excommunicated a Bishop Williamson, who essentially denies the Holocaust of the Jews. Even Argentina, when they discovered Williamson was living there, just plain threw him out of the country. As the world should throw his kind out of humanity. Or if you believe in loving enemies of humanity like Williamson is, just put him in an asylum, cut off from the outside world. Where he can play Nazi computer games to satisfy the devil within him.
Could it be because the Pope was born in 1928 and grew up in Nazi Germany? And has lost the capacity so many ultra conservative Catholics have lost - to be able to stand in the other persons shoes, and feel their pain.
Could it be because the Pope talks about unity - he wants the 600,000 followers of Williamson. What are the dues/year/ head.
Could it be because he needs a hearing aid and new glasses, to understand what Williamson is about?
This is our Pope? Who claims he and his advisors didn't know what Williamson was about? Give me a break. Is this the blind leading the blind in blind faith?
Or is this the time to Impeach the Pope, and send the man to a nursing home to live out his days contemplating his failures. Shown by documents leaked within the last year from the Vatican, where some members of the Hierarchy call his reign "a catastrophe".
There is one way to change the church - Close all of your pocketbooks. And so soon, you will see change, re-afirmming the old statement "money is the root of all evil".
And the absolute truth of what a nobel prize winner said:
There are always good people who do good things.
there are always evil people who do evil things.
But it takes (corrupt) religion to get good people to do evil things.
Where is the Church - Jesus Bride - heading?
Interesting I should come
Interesting I should come along this article tonight, after storming out of a meeting I was tricked into attending under the guise of "Confirmation preparation for parents" when it was actually a pro-life agenda directed inforamtion meeting.
I am a 42 year old Catholic, obviously raised in the dawn of Vatican II, who has embraced the peace and justice mission of my Church that was so heavily emphasized when I was a child. Unfortunately, I too have become disillusioned with a Church that is stuck on a broken record of abortion without addressing the issues tha lead to abortion in the first place: poverty, abuse, and social isolation.
I am calling to all my missing brothers and sisters to join me in taking back our Church!!!! No family is perfect, but if all the reasonable members leave, what is left? We all need to be there to hold the parents accountable. I believe that the Church is losing so much money, maybe now is the time they will start to listen and pay attention.
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