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What would Jesus do ... for himself?
As we sweat through the dog days of summer, all I want to do is sit on the porch, drink lemonade and play guitar. Typically, however, I have found it hard to relax. In the complex and unjust world we live in, it always seems like there is so much, too much, to do. In the end, there never seems like a lot of time to rest or take care of myself.
Our Catholic faith is very centered around doing, in particular doing for others. This is one of the things that I love the most about our church -- this attention to the needs of others. However, somewhere in there, I think we may lose sight of what we need to do for ourselves to be healthy, happy and whole.
Which brings me to the question: What would Jesus do for Himself?
Looking through the Gospels, there seem to be three key themes related to Jesus' self-maintenance.
1. Jesus spent time with friends.
So many stories in the Gospels show Jesus eating, drinking and enjoying the company of friends. Jesus even made friends with people who some would consider unworthy, such as the tax collectors mentioned in the Gospel of Mark.
I have found that, after leaving the school setting where friendships were a given and moving to a big city, that it can be hard to put myself out there to make new friends or nuture new friendships. It seems easier sometimes just to go home and play it safe.
While we all have different ideas of what it means to be a friend and different thresholds for the amount of friends we need, friendship is so important to leading happy and healthy lives. True friendship brings out the best in us, lets us relax and enjoy the gifts we have.
2. Jesus took time alone.
The Gospel of Luke reads, "The reputation of Jesus continued to grow. Large crowds gathered to hear him and to be healed of their sicknesses. But Jesus often withdrew to some place where he could be alone and pray."
Years ago, I never wanted to be alone. I always want to be surrounded by those I love and felt, on some level, that by taking alone time I would either be missing out or disappointing others.
It is crucial to carve out alone time to reflect, read, pray and so on. When we make that time, we are more able to cope with life's joys and challenges.
3. Jesus cared for his body.
The Gospel of Mark tells the story of a woman who anointed Jesus with perfumed oil in Bethany. Some of the apostles questioned this extravagance. But Jesus replied, "Let her alone. Why do you criticize her? She has done me a kindness."
I have to admit, up until my adult life, I had great disdain for spending too much time focused on caring for one's body. Much like the apostles, I thought this was an extravagance. At the same time, I was very disconnected from my body. I didn't pay attention to aches in my back or how certain shoes affected my posture. Getting a massage never crossed my mind.
Not to be too cliché, but our bodies are our temples and caring for them is anything but an extravagance. When we take care of our bodies, not only will we be better able to serve others, we will also be more in touch with our bodies themselves. It's a win-win, really.
Jesus knew that in taking care of Himself, He would be better able to care for others. So, as we round out the summer and sail into fall, I am going to try to emulate Jesus and take care of myself. Perhaps I will leave out the anointing, though, and opt for a mani/pedi instead.
Kate Childs Graham writes for ReligionDispatches.org and YoungAdultCatholics-Blog.com. She also serves on the Women's Ordination Conference board of directors and the Call to Action Next Generation Leadership Team.




i don't understand why i keep
i don't understand why i keep getting the "invalid captcha" message. as far as i know, 10 * 4 does equal 14. please advise.
The CAPTCHA module sometimes
The CAPTCHA module sometimes repeats itself as a sort of "double test." Irritating, I know, but a necessary spam blocker.
Make sure that you are running the most up-to-date versions of your browser software.
Dennis Coday
NCR online editor
It's nice to know someone
It's nice to know someone else has this problem. I found that it doesn't just happen here but also when leaving comments on blogs so it's something in the settings of our computers; I just can't figure out what. Once you leave a comment on one article though, you won't get the double captcha on others you want to leave comments on as long as it's done in the same window. Frustrating I know so here I go again....
Kate being a Catholic you are
Kate being a Catholic you are only partially correct about our bodies being temples. The more accurate fact is that in a Catholic context our bodies are in fact the temples of the Holy Spirit. This fact is pointed out several times in Holy Scripture and is echoed to this very day in the Catechism of the Catholic Church especially in conjunction with very high importance of the living of a correct Catholic moral life. An authentic full life lived in full accord with the Commandments and explained in the Catechism of the Catholic Church.
Remember the Feast of the Assumption of the Blessed Virgin Mary on Saturday! Alleluia! Alleluia! Alleluia!
Snowdrop, I don't know how
Snowdrop, I don't know how your answer relates to anything Kate was truly getting at...
...but then, mine didn't either, due to my "captcha" problem the other day. So I'll try again to say something relevent.
Kate, your observations are helpful and insightful. I, like many Christians, have struggled for decades with the question of what I might possibly owe to myself as differentiated from all "others." But I would have liked to see you take your conclusions a step further, to the psychological/interpersonal realm. Specifically: what would Jesus do if a close friend was behaving repeatedly in a way that he (Jesus) found personally hurtful? I mean, of course, not in theological/salvific terms (i.e., sin) but simply on the human level.
I hope I've been clear about what I mean, and I'd like to hear from anyone who has something pertinent to offer. Thanks.
I'll add my two cents twice
I'll add my two cents twice here. First, I agree that Snowdrop is grabbing at anything to put in a negative tone. I almost put in a comment when I saw none had been put in yet to say I wouldn't think anyone could have a problem with this article but I didn't. I should have known someone, somehow would come up with something. Let's face it, our bodies are not temples of us and we all know that Kate was inferring the Holy Spirit as that is what we have all been taught. Who would have thought, besides Snowdrop evidently, that it needed spelling out.
Second two cents are to your question as to what Jesus would do when faced with a hurtful friend. It's not easy and I don't do it well but Jesus gave his friend Judas his love and friendship even knowing he'd be turned against. He must have been hurt by his friends the disciples who he had chosen to accompany him when they couldn't understand him over and over and over again but he just kept on explaining and caring and trying to get through without hurting them back. I think if a friend is actually overtly abusive you have a right to call them on it and perhaps walk away as Jesus did to the hierarchy of his church when they hurt him but when it was unintentional as in the stupidity of his pals he put up with it the best he could. This is just my two cents and we know how much two cents is worth these days. Maybe someone else will have a better answer for both of us.
Thanks, earthenvessel, for
Thanks, earthenvessel, for your four cents. After careful forethought, I need to add another observation about Snowdrop's comment. It seems to me that s/he was attacking Kate's sexuality as revealed in the latter's prior columns. Reread Snowdrop's entry and you may agree. In which case perhaps SD will be happy that I contributed this insight. After all, no one wants to be thought of as simply negative, with no working agenda.
I'm not certain that one can
I'm not certain that one can talk about Jesus on a simply human level, since He is both man and God. Nonetheless, I get your point that there had to be times in Jesus' life when He was simply hanging out with friends and living an everyday life (indeed, isn't that the point of His "hidden years"? To remind us that, for much of His life, He lived and worked just as everyone else?).
If we use the Gospels as guide, I think we can safely say that in those instances wherein Jesus was hurt by those close to Him, He would have approached them honestly and forthrightly. Our Lord was never one to mince words, nor did He fear confrontation. But, at the same time, He was forgiving of human weakness. Undoubtedly He was profoundly hurt, not only on the theological, but also, and perhaps most especially on the human level, by the Apostles, and especially Peter, when they abandoned Him on Good Friday. Yet, He did not allow the hurt to slide, when after His resurrection He confronted Peter, asking him three times "Do you love Me" one time for each of Peter's denials. Yet, He forgave Peter and the Apostles their lack of faith and courage. He rebuked them, but then He forgave them.
If we want to draw a lesson from this, I suppose the one I draw from it is that people will always hurt me. Sometimes they intend to, but more often they do not even realize that they are doing it. They may be acting out of fear, or ignorance, or simple selfish ambitions. When this happens, as it will, I suppose I should follow Christ's example. Forgive. Always forgive. Sometimes that forgiveness can only happen as a result of confrontation and I should not be afraid to call a friend on the carpet, so to speak, when he or she has hurt me. But, at the end of the day, I should also be ready and willing to forgive. Confront when necessary, but forgive always.
That is the lesson I would draw from the life of Our Lord. I hope that this helps.
Please pray for me and I for thee.
Clint, thanks for your
Clint, thanks for your thoughtful reply. It does help, and in fact I acted just as you and others recommended. Of course, nobody promised things would turn out happily; I lost a friendship of 23 years. Sometimes I still have to pinch myself in order to accept the stark truth of this loss...but growth into new things and new thinking can be joyous. A door closes, a window opens.
Thanks also for your offer of an exchange of prayers. I accept.
Maggie - contact me. It has
Maggie - contact me. It has been 39 years!
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