National Catholic Reporter

The Independent News Source

An opening day reading

 |  NCR Today

I could write about Xavier University in Ohio dropping birth control coverage for its employees. Or the pope chastising priests who support women's ordination. Or about the Vicki Kennedy graduation speech controversy.

But I've done enough penance this Lent. Instead, I'll share this "Opening Day Genesis" reading by Glenn Birkemeier from McSweeney's for Opening Day, which I learned about from a fellow Catholic press colleague. If "And God said, Let there be light beer" doesn't make you smile, I can't help you.

In the big inning, God created Heaven on Earth. And it was without form, and void. God separated the dirt from the grass. He called the grass Outfield and the dirt He called Infield. God made the Infield a 90-foot square and the Outfield not less than 400 feet to center and 320 feet down the lines. He declared this Fair Territory. All other territory, God then declared, was Foul.

Read the rest here. Go Cubs!

NCR Comment code:

  • Be respectful. Do not attack the writer. Take on the idea, not the messenger.
  • Don't use obscene, profane or vulgar language.
  • Stay on point. Comments that stray from the original idea may be deleted.

We are not able to monitor every comment that comes through. If you see something objectionable, please click the "Report abuse" button. Once a comment has been flagged, an NCR staff member will investigate.

For more detailed guidelines, visit our User Guidelines page.

For help on how to post a comment, visit our reference page.

Sisters' Stories; read more

NCR Email Alerts

 

In This Issue

May 10-23, 2013

May10-cover.jpg

Not all of our content is online. Subscribe to receive all the news and features you won't find anywhere else.