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PDF versionFree Market Competition Intensifies Between Rome and Canterbury
by Ken Briggs on Oct. 20, 2009
This just in: the Episcopal response to Pope Benedict marketing plan to Anglicans:
Dear Benedict,
Hope this finds you in the pink of health as you prepare for the influx of Anglicans. As the Westminster cardinal and the Canterbury Archbishop said the other day, this marks the triumph of ecumenism.
Thanks a whole bunch for your special invitation to join the Roman Catholic Church. And that you'll create a sort of Ellis Island to process whole lots of us at a time. To paraphrase you, it's all for the purpose of welcoming "your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to be free."
I would be remiss if I didn't shout out to Roman Catholics to give us a look. Hospitality goes both ways. We're open for business.
To be honest, your exiles would have to adjust to some harsh realities if they decided to sign in with us. For one thing, they'd have to go along with the ordination of women. And another. They'd have to give up a streamlined system of ruling the church that gives all the power to the (male) clergy and hierachy. No more church conventions where lay people and priests share authority. One boss.
Then there's the gay thing. If your potential escapees don't know it already, gays and lesbians are allowed into the priesthood and now as bishops. For someone whose been led to believe that all the gays in the priesthood best keep it to themselves, the Episcopal church can be eye-opening.
They'd also have to give up papal infallibility.
Given those potential snags, we think there are plenty of Roman Catholics who may see our teachings as God's will. I know you would love to debate that over a beer, but such is the case. We think there are Catholics who believe that we, over the course of 400 years, have detected a thing or two about where the Holy Spirit is leading.
Next time you're in town, let's have lunch. Who knows, by then St. Thomas church, built by J.P Morgan himself, may have gone "over to Rome," while St. Malachy's could be flying the red, blue and white of Episcopal nation.
Yours in advance of the parousia, J. Hinkle Washburn +
For those Roman Catholics
For those Roman Catholics longing to hear some decent music, Anglican churches have it.
For those Roman Catholics bored to tears by anti-abortion sermons, Anglican churches have intelligent sermons.
For those Roman Catholics who would fail a polygraph test about their belief in the Syllabus of Errors, papal infallibility, women's inferiority, etc., etc., say goodbye Rome, hello Canterbury!
(The Syllabus of Errors teaches us that it is an error to believe that "Good hope at least is to be entertained of the eternal salvation of all those who are not at all in the true Church of Christ".)
I love it! This is priceless!
I love it! This is priceless! I had a friend once who said about non-Catholics, "They're ALL Catholic. They just don't know it."
In the name of all that is
In the name of all that is Holy is it possible for the NCR to just ONCE publish something that isn't full of snark and ill will? I mean my goodness anything that has the tiniest, most remote hint of "conservatism," "orthodoxy," "uber-rightwing-neo-nazi-fascist-Catholicism," or whatever the hell you label those who disagree with you as seems to be labeled as "out of date," "antiquated," "wrong," "not in step with the holy spirit..." and well you get the idea.
Might I suggest attempting to engage in some manner of understanding and civil discourse? Perhaps take a cue from John Allen Jr. and try to view both sides of the coin? The whining, snark and mistrust coming from both NCR writers and bloggers as well as those who disagree with NCR is childlike and disgusting.
Dear Franco: I guess you
Dear Franco: I guess you haven't noticed but John Allen Jr., is of the NCR. So I guess this answers your question and responds to your challenge. In other words, your self-righteous anger is, well, just self-righteous anger.
I am so close to jumping
I am so close to jumping over. . .I am just so close.
We might call them
We might call them "Canglicans". I wonder how Benedict and the unaccountable upholders of absolute, changless truth and institutional solidity and their traditionalist followers spell "c-h-a-n-g-e"?
This is a funny response, and
This is a funny response, and intelligent, witty response to what the pope has done, raiding the Anglicans for more conservative men, men who are homophobic and misogynist. Though some of these ex-anglican priests are married they nonetheless view women as spiritual inferiors, as unworthy to be clergy. So the pope welcomes malcontent men,from the Anglican church , men who are bigots and misogynists. Too bad for the RCC, How is what the pope does, denying marriage to Catholic priests, condemning homosexuals, condemning women clergy, how is that like Christ? Never does Jesus condemn women or men for their sexuality in the New Testament. He saves the adultress from death, he makes a great apostle to the gentiles out of the samaria lady.
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