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Fear of Being Out of Control

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Fear of Being Out of Control
When you feel you are in control, you feel reassured and comforted, even if it is an illusion. We see an example of this in the common fear of flying. In America, only a few hundred people at most die in airplane crashes each year, while over forty-four thousand die in motor vehicle accidents!


Nevertheless, this overwhelming statistical difference doesn’t cause a fear of driving because of the illusion that while in your car you feel in control. The goal of healthy living is to live in reality, not illusion. To achieve this goal, abandon trying to be in control, and strive to live happily despite all the dangers involved in being alive. Live, and also let others live, in reality. Refrain from manipulating and micromanaging others to maintain the illusion that you are in control of your life.

To enjoy life as an exciting adventure,
more thrilling than any roller coaster,
I strive not to be in control of anything,
being safety-belted secure in your love.

From A Book of Wonders by Ed Hays

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Are You Illiterate?
My Irish great-grandfather was illiterate, a result of imperial Britain’s ban on the education of the Irish. He immigrated to America in 1840, and in the place on his immigration papers requiring his signature he made an “X.” Today in the twenty-first century, the majority of adults can read and write. But even if you can, you may still be illiterate! According to Alvin Toffler, “the illiterate of the twenty-first century will be…those who cannot learn, unlearn, and relearn.” More painful than learning is unlearning; it is more difficult than teaching new tricks to an old dog. It requires kicking out from beneath you old structures that give you a secure sense of support. This century’s new unfortunate illiterate ones will be those unable to unlearn what they were taught by schools, the state, and their church. For only those who are able to unlearn will in turn be able to learn new ways to live in a complex evolving age of change.

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Force me to strenuously use an eraser
to remove my mind’s old knowledge
that stymies my soul and stagnates me,
so I’ll be eager and ready to learn new ways.

From A Book of Wonders by Ed Hays

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Prayer action suggestion:
Practice losing control this week. Move outside your range of comfort and familiarity. Tell someone about the experience.

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Want to know more about Fr. Ed Hays?

--Read a profile on Fr. Hays

Visit Ave Maria Press for a full selection of books by Fr. Hays.

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In This Issue

July 18-31, 2014

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