The secret lives of our noble priests

Thanks to Eugene Cullen Kennedy for another great column. Working for the National Federation of Priests Councils, I interact with good and even great priests from all over the United States, and on occasion meet good and great priests from abroad. On the NFPC Facebook page, we try to gather and disseminate the good news from a variety of sources about priests in the fields and trenches. Good and great priests sometimes do get their names in the newspaper, though never with the same enthusiasm as do those fewer in number priests who commit crimes or cause scandals. Living alone, pastoring three, four or even five parishes, paid little, having few younger priests to come work alongside them, shaky retirement resources, and being hung out to blame at times by bishops, priests today are under great stress. And mostly because they care, truly care, about people. Affirm the good and great priests you know. Encourage them. Challenge them. Feed them (literally, sometimes!) Most of al;l, thank them.

www.nfpc.org

Unfortunately, these "good" priests depend for their livelihood on a dysfunctional institution that denies full personhood to females, insists that only ordained clergy can form/maintain a eucharistic community, and has a Luddite-mentality in which little to no change can be accomplished, including foresaking live languages.

One can be a great exemplar, but by complying with a dysfunctional institution, one tarnishes the example.

Your sad piece raises the question of what might help beyond enduring in pain.

Eight years ago in Boston, 58 priests joined in a public, signed call for the departure of the Cardinal when the stench from the core of the Archdiocese had become intolerable. The Boston Globe shows their letter:

http://www.boston.com/globe/spotlight/abuse/stories3/121002_letter.htm

Some were excoriated then and since for views on other issues, but they found a common voice at the time to help right a crippling wrong. Recently, some priests online have (anonymously) described their fears of speaking out these days. Occasionally, an individual priest makes the news, illustrating the problem. If there were 5800 good priests, or 580, or even 58 again who could do as their predecessors did, the situation you describe should improve noticeably for many.

Many many good,kind,generous priests see to it that the newly born get baptized,the dead buried,marriages performed,sick annointed,parishoners consoled, etc....
underappreciated and certainly underpaid......overseen by scribes and pharisees who demand obedience to letter of law and forbid any discussion on celibacy,married clergy,women priests, gay and lesbian relationships,etc
almost like the middle ages?????
God bless the many good priests......

Thank you for this. The Church is never going to get better until we stop demonizing one another.

Thank you for the touching reminder. I know a number of these men and in different parts of the world. I will remember to think of and pray for them in a special way this Thanksgiving, grateful for their presence and perseverance among those they serve "above and beyond"...

From a female who believes in servant leader priests for our Church: celibate or married; male or female

This is so true and so touched my heart. I know and have worked with many "men of God" who are a blessing to all of us.

My heart and prayers are with each of those who keep on...keeping on...

Bless you, Father, bless YOU!!!!

WERE IT NOT for good priests that we know, we would not have hope that the clerical culture could do better.

The challenge for good priests is the same as the challenge for people in general: Good people have to stand for something and do something to improve situations or oppose oppressions (like Jesus). Good people cannot be inanimate goodness.

I think Catholic priests in general have sat on the sidelines too long. Too many have aspired to be bishops (or other honors), got too comfortable in their lives, looked the other way when there is wrongdoing and abuses of all kinds in the church, and have failed to stand with suffering people.

Sure many priests are working hard at long-hours at this or that "stuff" but cannot get to what is meaningful in life. Maybe that is not their fault, but I don't hear them calling for the ordination of married priests, for example, to help lighten their load or calling for the empowerment of lay people to be anything else than their obedient employees.

I don't think the media is ignoring good priests. It is getting harder and harder to find their stories.

As always Gene has a way of delivering his message that is masterful and I
second all that he says about the many canonical parish priests who continue,
despite all the negative publicity, to do God's work for the People of God.

Now as a married priest, it would be helpful for him to speak a word for
those like himself, who remain good priests, but have chosen to answer an added calling to marry. Jesus had no problem in selecting the leader of his apostles,Peter, who happened to be a married man. There is no doubt that others among His apostles and disciples were also married. This in no way detracted from their service to the Lord and to the people who thronged to Him with their many needs.
I spent many months this year seeking help from the National Catholic Reporter
to publish an article my wife and I prepared providing testimony from several wives of good and dedicated married priests who continue to serve, not as
clerics but as ordained Catholic priests, the thousands of Christians who
are no longer practicing Catholics,for one reason or another, but who have
retained their faith in God and are longing for a spirituality that is not
always recognizable in today's hierarchical Church.

For some reason there seems to be a real hesitation on the part of the Catholic media to inform the public that many good Catholic priests are married, and along with raising a family and working full time to support themselves, are available to those who come to them for assistance. As an ordained priest for 55 years and a husband, father and now grandfather, for 40 of those years, I would simply like the acknowledgement that I am not a former or "ex-priest." At 82,I am a priest forever, according to Holy Scripture.

I was ordained in the early 1960s and left the priesthood in the early 1970s to marry. In the intervening 40 years, I have cherished my continued friendships with many of my classmates and contemporaries and have rejoiced with them as they lived joyously through the hopeful and exciting years immediately following Vatican II, suffered with them during the long pontificate of John Paul as the fires kindled by the Council were slowly smothered, dimmed and finally extinguished and wept with them as the sexual abuses of the few colored the lives, ministry and reputations of the many. Yet through it all, I have never ceased to be deeply moved and continually edified by the deep committment of these men to their ministry and their love for the people to whom they minister. Thank you, Gene Kennedy, for your lovely and well-deserved tribute to these brave and holy men. As I look with sadness at the current crop of recently-ordained, I fear we may never know their kind again.

Gene -- Beautifully expressed, lacking your usual verbosity, tangled metaphors, and bitterness. It sounds like it comes from the heart. Keep up the good work. Regards, one of your freshman '57-'58 charges.

Wow, Gene, you've really hit the nail on the head. I am no longer an active priest, but I recognize the lives of my contempororaries. I don't know how they do it, but I can only observe what they do with admiration and amazement.

Thank you, Eugene. I needed to read this.
john t.

Thank you, Gene, this is beautiful true and understated. You and "my brother, Joseph" are cut from the same cloth and molded in the same form. God Bless You!!!

Peace,
Deacon Dismas G. Fernandez

Godislove

"Despite the withering fire of the sex abuse wars, these priests have not deserted and they don’t complain much either. The reason for that may be that their people have troubles enough of their own and they don’t want to hear any of Father’s."

There are thousands of these heroic priests. So, why aren't they our shepherds, instead of Benedict's buffoons? The JPII clones clinging tenaciously to power elites like barnacles on ship's hull. Siding with reactionary forces who want to perpetuate war, deny adequate guaranteed medical care for all, and other instances involving giving a swift back of the hand to the weak, discriminated, and the poor in their fold.

As someone who is normally no fan of Mr Kennedy's column, that really was beautiful. I work in a parish and am amazed at the good priests who give so much, are looked down upon so quickly, and who zip around the community to encounter life, death, and real human suffering in all of its plurality. Parish life, at best, is about serving the People of God. It should be rooted in good theology and its worship should be conducive to elevating our hearts and minds to God. But for those who work in a parish and especially with regards to the priests it is about serving God's people.

A good parish, like a good family, is at the crossroads of life and death, joy and sorrow, and ultimately the meeting place of God and the world. It's where we are served and where we serve. It's from the parish that we are sent out to do Jesus' work in our families and communities.

I'll close writing something that I thought I'd never write: Thank you Mr Kennedy.

thank you very much for this.

we all of course wonder what the deleted word was where (work) was inserted, but thank you very much for this.

now with this I can stand and walk, and go, and leave for a week in Ciudad Juarez.

thank you very very much for this.

Wonderful and so very true!

I hope Kennedy will contribute some of these much needed articles that
highlight these priests, celebrates them. Maybe one for every critical
piece he writes (no matter rthe subject).

Thank you for reminding us of priests who "empty themselves" for the benefit of God's people. Yes they are there, along with so many others, social workers, counelors, medical personnel at clinics for the poor, people who provide disaster relief, inner city school teachers, etc.. Priests, however, face one challenge that other occupations don't - fewer people are in training to replace them.

Current priests cannot take nearly as much time as they need to take to retreat and to re-energigize so that they do not burn themselves out. When will the church wake up and see that many people are being called to ministry, but are not "allowed" to minister because they are the wrong gender or orientation? When will the church realize that laity, who receive a decent working wage, could be doing many of the administrative functions that consume the time of so many priests, thus freeing those priests to aid in actual minstering?

While I can sympathize with individual priests who are stretched beyond their limits, I cannot sympathize with an institution that creates its own problems.

Amen, amen. I am privileged to work among many good priests--more good than not in fact. They have suffered terribly from the crimes of some priests, fearing all are cast into the same net.

No one stops to think how demanding their work is--a good one is always on duty because he knows disasters don't always occur between 9 and 5. He suffers criticism for decisions about which he cannot go into detail (if he hears any comment at all); he is held to a standard no mere human could ever achieve; and of course the strain between bishops and their priests has left them feel hung out to dry.

While even they (or most of them) do not want to be put on a pedestal--most know it's a long way down when they fall--they do want to hear "thank you, you made a difference for me" from time to time. It's what keeps them going.

There are a few stories out there about good priests. Here's one:

By RON LEONARDI
Erie Times-News

ERIE, Pa. (AP) _ If there's a major social, educational or environmental issue affecting Erie residents, chances are good you'll find the Rev. Jerry Priscaro at the center of the debate.

Parishioners at St. Ann Catholic Church know the 49-year-old Priscaro as their celebrant on Sunday and as the ``activist priest'' away from church.

``When I feel strongly about something, I will come out in the open, but always in a very civil and respectful way,'' Priscaro said.

There's been no shortage of issues this year.

Outspoken and highly visible in the public, Priscaro regularly attends Erie City Council, Erie School Board and Erie County Council meetings, and often leads public rallies on issues he's passionate about.

``I think it's important for a priest to connect with people, and to connect with them on several levels,'' Priscaro said. ``I'm a multidimensional priest. I'm not just a spiritual priest, I'm also a community leader and community-activist type of priest.''

A native of New Castle, Priscaro has spent the majority of his life in Erie.

He grew up on Erie's lower east side and said he's always possessed an activist mentality.

``Every clergyman has a responsibility to be a man of the people and also to be a man of God,'' Priscaro said. ``That involves both civic responsibilities and spiritual responsibilities. I see this as one of my civic responsibilities to help contribute to the betterment of the community.''

But Priscaro's path to the priesthood didn't begin until 1985, when he was 25.

After studying hotel and restaurant management at Mercyhurst College, Priscaro worked from 1979 through 1985 as a manager or assistant manager for Perkins and Wendy's restaurants in Erie and Ashtabula, Ohio.

Though he found the restaurant business to be fulfilling work, he said he realized at that time there was something ``bigger for me to do in life than simply work in that business.''

``Call it a higher calling,'' Priscaro said. ``I grew up in a family of faith. Faith is a very important thing in my life. I have two aunts who are with the Sisters of St. Joseph. I felt that as much as I loved the restaurant business, there were more significant things I could do with my life.''

Priscaro said that ``higher calling'' was always there since ``I was a kid.''

``I don't think I was ready to answer it until I was 25,'' he said.

Priscaro, who grew up at 1123 East Lake Road, traces his strong interest in social-justice issues to his mother, Agnes Priscaro, 75, chairwoman of the Erie Housing Authority.

She was a nurse at Hamot Medical Center during her son's childhood. At that time, she also was actively involved with the St. Martin Center, 1701 Parade St., initially as a volunteer and later as a board member.

``She was very involved with the African-American community and with poor people,'' the Rev. Priscaro said. ``When I was a kid, I remember visiting a lot of the different places my mother would visit. I saw all the people involved in all these social justice issues, and education and community activism. I think a lot of that rubbed off on me.''

Agnes Priscaro said she often took her son to Erie's Immaculate Conception Center because she wanted him to learn about different cultures and to show him how people lived.

``I wanted him to be aware of differences and how some people struggled,'' she said. ``I think he learned there are a variety of people who are all struggling for the same things. He seemed to accept that fact.''

Agnes Priscaro, a longtime organist at St. Ann Catholic Church, said her son was involved in Boy Scouts, Boys Baseball and was a water boy with the football team at the former St. John Kanty Prep.

``Anywhere he was, he was always associated with a variety of people,'' she said. ``I think that's given him the knack for being able to deal with a variety of people, cultures and issues.''

The Rev. Priscaro began his studies for the priesthood in 1985 at St. Marks Seminary in Erie. He was ordained a Roman Catholic priest in April 1993 at St. Peter's Cathedral.

``He's always tried to respond to the needs of people and the less fortunate,'' said the Rev. James O'Hara, of St. Ann Catholic Church. ``Now he's stepping forward and trying to bring about needed changes in society.''

O'Hara, 70, has spent a combined 33 years during two stays at St. Ann, and remembers Priscaro when he was an altar boy in elementary school.

``He always was concerned about people, even before he entered the priesthood,'' O'Hara said.

Agnes Priscaro said she was elated when her son decided to pursue the priesthood.

``Jerry was an altar boy for several years at St. Ann's, and he was always impressed with the priesthood because the priests there set such a good example for him,'' she said.

Since 1999, the Rev. Priscaro has served in Erie at St. Paul Catholic Church, St. Boniface Catholic Church and St. Andrew Catholic Church.

Priscaro has been a priest in residence at St. Ann since 2007. He is a chaplain for six nursing homes, the Dr. Gertrude A. Barber National Institute and Holy Family School.

``I like to get involved in civic things as well because the human needs of people are very important, just as much as the spiritual needs,'' the Rev. Priscaro said.

Issues he pursues include social, environmental and political.

``He's very studious, and he researches every issue until he knows it backward and forward,'' O'Hara said.

The Rev. Priscaro has been actively involved with the neighborhood watch group in Erie's Little Italy.

This past spring, the Rev. Priscaro participated in several public protests opposing Erie Renewable Energy's controversial tires-to-energy plant once planned for Erie.

The priest also has been a strong proponent of Erie County Executive Barry Grossman's proposed plan to establish a community college in Erie County.

``The community college is one of the best educational opportunities that this community has to lift itself out of poverty,'' the Rev. Priscaro said. ``Right now, higher education is very unaffordable to a lot of people, especially a lot of young people. I believe in equal access to education.''

The cornerstone of his agenda has been an effort to persuade city officials to renovate or replace the McBride Viaduct.

The bridge, built in 1938 and rebuilt in 1972, has been closed since June 2 because of significant structural deficiencies.

The viaduct carries traffic south of East 12th Street to Buffalo Road and Erie's upper east side.

``Monsignor McBride was the pastor at St. Ann's Church from 1919 to 1946,'' the Rev. Priscaro said. ``I've done a lot of research and I've found out the man spent 20 years of his priesthood fighting with government officials to have a bridge built there.

``When I read everything it took to get a bridge initially built there in 1938, how could you not feel for a man who had that kind of passion?'' the Rev. Priscaro said. ``Here's a man who worked hard to get a bridge built there. Let's not do away with it so quickly and so easily. Let's see what can be done to revive it and restore it.''

Since late August, the Rev. Priscaro has organized three roadside rallies in support of renovating or rebuilding the bridge, and has urged Erie officials to apply for state and federal funding to repair it.

``These are all social justice issues, and social justice is very much an important part of the Catholic faith,'' he said.

``What we're doing here is very moral and very connected to the community, very much positive focused,'' the Rev. Priscaro said. ``Everything I say and do, my intention is to simply encourage people who have the power to get things done to do that. We have a long way to go because there's a lot of people hurting and a lot of people struggling in life. Whatever I can do to help make their life better, that's what I want to do.''

___

Information from: Erie Times-News, http://www.goerie.com

Our parish is blessed to have two such noble priests.

This is the truth about most priests I know, including my bother and my priest friends. They often walk in the darkness with only a few of us companioning them

Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. And I have not the slightest doubt about this picture because I, too, have seen and do see this in many priest-friends over the years. Thank God for them - and for you for telling it like it isd for them.

Excellent reflection on the sad commentary regarding the life of today's good
and holy priests who seldom get recognition for their self-sacrificing lives.
We, the faithful, need to show them our support and love not only in our prayers but also in our actions for which we do not need the press/media. The un-sung heroes in our midst...those who keep their committment are deserving of the Crown reserved for those good and faithful servants St Paul and Jesus describe to us in the Gospels. May they all be strengthened by the Holy Spirit in their noble struggles.

A friend sent me this wonderfully written & timley article...I will surely pass it on to at least one priest I know who's been showing signs of "cranky" lately that are not at all like him....but I'm most interested in the phrase "The Great Generous Comedian" - rather than interpret it for myself (the nuns taught me not to do that - Ha!) I'd like to hear any and all you have to say about it.
Thanks & God Bless Ya,
Tommy Moore

In one full week, only one NCR reader was moved to comment on this very positive essay about priests?

Our priests are certainly overworked. Some that I know limit their ministry to what they individually can do...the potential ministry of laymen, laywomen, and deacons is rarely tapped, if ever. Until trust arises between clergy and laity, this sad failure of ministry will continue.
JR

Many of us work to help and heal others. Having worked in the field of nursing for many years I can identify with the drained feeling one might have in trying to help others. Having a personal life besides a career helps one to celebrate one's own life more deeply. Coming home to my children and husband and the other demands of this life put a perspective on reality and what is more within what we can answer for in the big picture of caring and giving. So many of our priests are living sterile lives, secret lives, mechanical lives that they are just drained. It shows in their approach to their community, in their sermons, and has led to a loss of vibrancy in their own lives and to the priesthood. We are living in hard times for the Church. Laity are not as bad off as the priests. They still have their own door to the good God without the institution of the Church draining them.

Thank you for upholding great men, who give their lives everyday without a murmur. I know many priests, who give, give, give and they are truly Christ to me.

I, too, thank you for writing about our "good" priests. I have only known good priests and wounded priests - those who are in prison for various reasons. Yes, we don't celebrate our good priests often enough or let them know how much we appreciate them giving their all to each and every parishioner. I know it is not easy dealing with the multitude of personalities in a parish, and yet our priests always have a smile and a note of humor. They have given up a lot to minister to us in the name of the Lord, and we do appreciate it. We don't always know how to show our appreciation. I pray for all the priests who I know and have known; for those I don't know (those in prison) but to whom I minister because they are God's children and they are loved; for our sick and homeless priests (thanks to their bishops), for our elderly priests who gave so much of themselves, for our dying priests that the Lord will enfold them in His arms and welcome them Home, and for our priests who are always there for us - may they all feel God's mercy and love, and may we, their flock, show them what their commitment and love means to us. ... and they'll know us by our love.

Uplifting holy priests - or just plain old regular priests - provides a crucial seraph in healing after the Catholic child abuse scandal. I know. As fan of your article, I survived abuse for years, to remain Catholic and write a dryly witty chronicle at the request of my diocese of my faith journey - which traveled from one holy priest and one devoted lay Catholic to the next .... RESTORING SANCTUARY info found at http://www.tpittgreen.org. God bless priests for their sacrifice of self that baffles our age.

We all have met and admired priests like the one whose letter you posted..... especially those in the inner cities. Thank you, all priests out there who are 'running on empty'... may the HS keep re-filling your tank.

Being a parish priest, especially in a one-priest parish is a hard, hard job Everyone needs some downtime, rest and privacy. The rectory system works against that. Someone in each diocise needs to be tasked to be concened with the psycholgical and physical health of the priests, reminding them to eat right, exercise and take time off.

Dear Mr. Kennedy, You are right on about Catholic Priests. When most sought ordination they had a sincere desire to serve GOD and Humans with all the weaknesses each of us possess. The Priest understands better than most the great suffering undertaken by JESUS CHRIST and HIS Followers and lives his life to all of those under his charge to better understand what our life and those around each of us should mean. The Priestly Vocation encourages all of us to LOVE ONE ANOTHER as HE LOVES US! The Priest is a human being and as such suffers human frailties as all of us do. All of us must pray for our Priests and all in our lives daily. This is an EXPIERIENCE OF LOVE.

Gene Kennedy's article was heartfelt and, of course, accurate. I am only surprised that this article has generated so much positive interest when the author is saying what is obvious to those of us who know priests. Have we been so lacking in recognizing the character and selfless contributions of priests to the public good that it takes a pundit like Gene to raise the visibility of those faithful shepherds? Below the radar, I suspect that Gene's comments are no surprise to the millions of parishoners out there who truely love and admire their priests. We should not conclude, however, from Gene's article and the popular support for priests that all is well. Priests are still held to impossible standards and most often have to survive in circumstances unfriendly to the human spirit and generally to human development. Kudos to those priests who survive and prosper despite these circumstances. Postscript: Gene's articles have personal interest for me as a former students of his at CU where he tried to rattle all the comfortable certainties we acquired in the philosphy department. He is till rattling.

It's nice that someone is stating the obvious. There are many very fine priests & they bear the brunt of a terible form of anti-Catholicism which tries to see every priest as a potential abuser. And a lot of this mentality exists among Catholics themselves.

However, the Catholic Church is not some sort of big tent which can hold the views of all people who call themselves Catholic. It seems to me that most of the people today who were born Catholic have in fact left the Church whether they realize it or not by their sins against the faith. The term "faithful" probably only applies to about 10 - 20% of the people in the Church today.

In my parish there is a 71 year old priest who is still working hard especially for the poor. He drives a rusted out van and brings food and other things to the poor in the inner city. He has a recycling thing going that raised $8000. for the poor and collects hot food every 3rd Sunday. He is a man of prayer and considered something of a saint by all who know him. He calls us to our better selves. On the FEourth of July one of our sisters was in the hospital. We found him making calls on parishioners who were ill on the 4th of July when we visited. I am sure you will never read this in the newspapers. Good does not make headlines.

In my humble opinion Dr. Kennedy has eloquently written in the media the words that are branded in the hearts of many. Thank you, Eugene Cullen Kennedy. The message of these words, however, is branded in both the hearts of the conservative and the hearts of the liberals, including the hearts of those who have erroneously been labeled Catholic bashers.

The conundrum of “how” to help the noble priests who remain to continue to help the helpless as well as each one of us, seems to be where the disparity between the conservative and liberal thought becomes a wide cavern, an insurmountable cavern.

For anyone to believe that liberals and “Catholic bashers” do not care about the noble priest is to not see from where the pain that causes such thoughts originates. In fact, to make such a claim (liberals and “Catholic bashers” do not care about the noble priest) is likely victimizing a victim, a victim whose heart has or is being torn out.

Such a victim might be the mother of the priest Eugene Cullen Kennedy quoted. For, if I were this burned out priest’s mother, I would be pounding on the doors of the Vatican to open the doors of marriage for the priesthood so my son could get some help.

Did anyone notice how many “ex-priests” (I know, no such thing!) have posted in response to this post alone? Then there are all the women who have discerned that they are called to the priesthood.

If I were this burned out noble priest’s mother, I would be pounding on Vatican doors so my son could have , as Fr. Greg Smith puts it, someone “to be concened with the psycholgical and physical health of the priests, reminding them to eat right, exercise and take time off,” an intimate someone, a caring-to-the-bone someone, a soul-touching someone, a wife. God expects each of us to do as this noble priest does – but with a companion.

Then there are brothers and sisters of a priest who have had their sibling “taken away.” And not only taken-away, they are forced to watch the system annihilate their loved one.

Then there is always the question of, “Whose heart, besides his own, did the priest have to break in order to continue his ministry?” These rejected ones are victims who are now finding voice.

Who had children molested by priests who were protected by bishops? - victims.

Those who were abused – victims.

And those with altered sexual preferences and their families that watch them silently suffer - victims.

The list goes on.

The number of victims keeps piling up – and now too many want to label them Catholic bashers.

Like this noble priest is not complaining, most “Catholic bashers” are NOT bashing. Both are only stating needs that NEED to be addressed.

From the bottom looking up, it appears the Vatican is making more victims. Now it includes their own noble priests.

To deny the lessons life has taught, the lessons the victims have learned, is to deny truth, To deny Truth is to deny God. The Truth is infuriating. If ones turns the anger inward, as the conservatives are demanding, one is likely to commit suicide. When one expresses the anger outwardly, they are labeled “bashers”.

What’s wrong with the picture of God the Vatican is pressing on us to believe???????

Let us pray.